Practicing Forgiveness This Holiday Season — Even When It’s Hard

The holidays are often described as the season of joy, peace, and togetherness. But for many families, this time of year can stir up painful memories, old arguments, or unresolved tension. If your family has had a tough year — filled with disagreements, distance, or hurt feelings — forgiveness may be the last thing you feel ready to give. Yet, forgiveness, even when it feels difficult, can be one of the most powerful gifts you offer yourself this Christmas.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting or excusing what happened. It’s not about pretending that hurtful words or actions didn’t matter. Instead, forgiveness is about releasing the emotional weight those experiences carry — choosing to let go of resentment so it no longer controls your peace. During the holiday season, when emotions can run high and family gatherings bring people back together, practicing forgiveness can open the door to healing, connection, and a calmer state of mind.

Research in mental health has shown that forgiveness benefits not just relationships but also physical and emotional well-being. Letting go of grudges can reduce stress, lower blood pressure, and improve overall happiness. On the other hand, holding on to anger keeps your body in a constant state of tension. By forgiving, you’re not saying “it’s okay”; you’re saying, “I’m choosing peace over pain.” That choice is deeply empowering.

If forgiveness feels too hard to give right now, start small. Begin by practicing self-forgiveness. Maybe you regret something you said or didn’t do this year. Offer yourself compassion instead of criticism. Remind yourself that growth often comes through mistakes and that you’re allowed to start again. Self-forgiveness lays the foundation for extending grace to others later.

You can also ease into forgiveness by shifting your perspective. Ask yourself what might have caused the conflict or misunderstanding. Were others acting out of stress, fear, or their own pain? Understanding doesn’t excuse behavior, but it helps you humanize the situation, which makes forgiveness possible. Sometimes, the first step toward healing is simply seeing others — and yourself — as imperfect people doing the best they can.

This holiday season, try creating quiet moments to reflect on what you’d like to release before the new year. Journaling, prayer, mindfulness, or attending Yoga Nidra class with Livia can all help calm your mind and soften emotional tension. When you’re in a relaxed state, it becomes easier to process feelings with compassion and clarity. Even if forgiveness doesn’t happen overnight, every effort to let go brings you closer to peace.

At Kairos Constructive Counseling, we understand that family relationships can be complicated — especially around the holidays. Our compassionate therapists can help you navigate difficult emotions, build communication skills, and find your own path to forgiveness. Whether through individual counseling, family therapy, or mindfulness-based sessions, we’re here to support your healing journey.

You deserve a holiday filled with peace of mind, not emotional weight. If you’re ready to release old pain and start the new year with a lighter heart, schedule a session with one of our licensed therapists today. Forgiveness may not be easy, but it is possible — and it just might be the most meaningful gift you give yourself this season.